Family Stories Around the Campfire

Growing up in the good old days, stories of family members and events were passed down from generation to generation.  We listened to the family tales and heard all about what assorted family members had gotten up to and achieved.  The “gotten up to” was to be avoided and the achievements were to be celebrated and emulated.   

During gatherings like those, a lot of systemic thoughts, feelings, language, and actions were shared.  This created a tighter bond between family members, as well as some spectacular fights. People knew that grandma had a little hip flask and grandpa had a little black book.

Nowadays life is much busier, and we don’t to take the time to sit down with each other to share those nuggets of family lore. We hear many people complain about feeling disconnected.  Those stories weren’t just stories, they clearly contained clues and warnings about our family systems. They were important.

Genealogy sites tell us where we belong in our family system and connect us to those who came before us.  Some sites may even mention significant family events. While they give us a felt sense of our connections to our history, they don’t teach us why those connections are so important.

Emotional DNA does.  Exploring the language and events in the family, we discover a wealth of unique patterns of thoughts, feelings, language and actions that can provide insights into what drives our own mindsets and behaviors.  With insight comes the ability to choose whether to repeat or change the patterns.  

In August you may be in the middle of family time. This is the perfect opportunity to discuss all the family stories you remember, along with their ups and downs. Notice together which one of you in your family might be repeating some of the patterns of your ancestors and ask yourselves how. Ideal places to go looking are the ways you handle, relationships, careers, money and dreams.  This simple discussion can create insight and awareness in a way that is light yet profound.  You may discover some things about yourself that you never knew.

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