Owning Your Independence

In America we are about to celebrate Independence Day, and there is something extremely exciting about that.  It took restlessness and ambition on the part of the founding fathers to create this wonderful social experiment we call the United States of America.  It didn’t happen through complacency and acceptance.  It required a rewiring of their thoughts, feelings, and actions.

They had to step away from a familiar, but not so comfortable system they knew, to be open to finding something even better.  There was a lot of anger, annoyance, restlessness, and a deep desire for independence from what was deemed a domineering mother country.  If the mother country wouldn’t give the child independence, the child needed to find a way to individuate – and it did.  Instead of following the old ways, it added some of its own and became the country of “can do” and innovation. That was its unique voice.

As individuals we are constantly looking for our own voices, sparks, and independence.  We too want to be something special and make an impact.  What holds us back are often the limiting systemic sentences that have echoed through the generations of our family system.  What propels us forward are new thoughts, feelings and deep knowing that there is more out there, and we want to be a part of it.  

Limiting sentences like, “You can’t make a living doing that.,” and “What makes you think you’re so special?” stop us from taking one step further and we return to familiarity. However, something begins to change when we invest in new systemic sentences that come not from prior generations, but a future we are beginning to imagine.  In other words, we start to create a strong systemic language that we can believe in that propels us forward, as we begin to have a sense or our own possibility and independence.  

Ask yourself where you are stuck right now.  What sentences do you need to set down in order to start imagining your future?  What sentences do you need to create to pull yourself into the future?  What does independence look like for you?  What impact will you create when you own it?

The words that you listen to and the words that you tell yourself matter.  Which ones are you buying in to?  To learn how to craft words that are in service of your growth and independence, visit us at judywilkins-smith.com.