Fear and Emotional DNA Webinar

May 13, 2020

Community Call with Q+A

Topic: Scars Fear Leave Behind On Our DNA

Let’s shift those fears and Reveal, Reframe, Rewire the stories and emotions we are programming in this unknown time. We are programming our emotional DNA and we are passing this down with our physical DNA to our descendants. Watch the webinar recorded on May 13, 2020 below and join us for an in depth look at this topic in our Emotional DNA Workshop scheduled for May 29-31, 2020. Special discount code available for limited time.


Feel free to share with your friends, family and colleagues who would benefit from being part of our community conversation.



Interactive Genealogy Is About to Change Your Life

Genealogy is more than a record of your ancestry. It holds the clues to where you belong, and how and why you struggle or succeed. And if you know how to look at what’s in your lineage, it may just change your life–now and for generations to come.

Using what you know to decode your Emotional DNA and recode your future

This is a shout-out to ancestry.com, 23andme.com, and all of you who have eagerly pursued your roots (myself included). It’s exciting to find out where you come from and to whom you’re related but the question is, what do you do with that information?

Most of us connect, smile and close the computer. Some of us are driven to trace our roots back as far as we can, and we’re even a bit fascinated by the similarities we may uncover. However most of us don’t realize that clues to our own success are contained in events and decisions made by our ancestors. They shape who we are for generations–until someone chooses to be the changemaker.

Applying systemic work and exploring family constellations can show you what to do with what you’ve learned about your ancestry through interactive genealogy. By exploring our ancestry through a deeper systemic lens, we begin to see that actions, language, mindsets, successes and failures often repeat. In fact, you might ask yourself if your limitations and failures began with you.

The conscious awareness of what lives in our system stops our history from becoming our future.

You’ve heard me say many times not only do we inherit our physical DNA, we also inherit our Emotional DNA. You may want to look at your thoughts and points of view and see if indeed they belong to you and if they serve you. If the answer is no, then also know this. The future is yours to change!

Decisions about the significant events in our families create patterns that can affect our success and failure without us realizing that the inheritance has trickled down to us. So sometimes when we feel stuck or lost it may pay us to do more than just look at where we belong. In fact, it may not even be our stuck-ness!

Using the systemic approach and constellations, we can illuminate hidden patterns, and work to resolve or reframe them. We can turn our limitations into the gifts and opportunities they were meant to be.

You are the changemaker. Once you know what lives in your systems, beginning with your family system you can consciously decide what to keep, what to change and what to leave behind.

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Explore the next step on your journey of discovery with me, and dive into Emotional DNA and Your Genealogy in my 1-day workshop at Disney World in Florida.

Tapping Into Your Success DNA

Be a changemaker. Create your own Success DNA.
Success is delightful. It generates that feeling of can-do, a sense that we’re fulfilling our potential. It’s like a door has opened and we’re making a real difference. You find yourself wishing you could feel that way every day.

Yet as much as we crave success, for many people, success is a real fear. Some of us are afraid our success might suggest an inflated ego or a less spiritual path. We’re frightened of losing friends. By contrast, we seem to have no trouble creating our failures and repeating them with annoying frequency.

It’s as though we’re somehow sabotaging that which we desire most. We may find ourselves saying things like “It’s not meant to be,” or “There’s another plan for me.” We may look at our families and think, “It’s as though we are doomed all live mediocre lives.” Sound frustratingly familiar?

Your frustration is urging you to being your own journey to success. 
As intrigued as we are by the struggles and successes of our ancestors, luck has absolutely nothing to do with it. Although we can create it based on our decisions about events in our lives, most of our Success (or Failure ) DNA is inherited, much like our Physical DNA. Patterns of success and failure are handed down through generations, created by our ancestors’ unique language, mindsets and actions. And what began as our history can become our present and unless we pay attention, also our future. In the world of what we might call interactive genealogy, you are the changemaker.

Can you mindfully create your own Success DNA? 
The brain thinks, the heart feels. The brain creates a mindset and the heart responds with an emotion that reinforces the mindset. This becomes our truth, then it becomes the truth and we live by that without stopping to consider that it may be the decisions about the events in our lives or those of our ancestors, that have created our limitations.

However, what looks like failure in one generation can often morph into success in the next. Once we know what patterns live in our systems, we can change them. Using constellations and the systemic approach to explore these patterns, we can interactively gain new insights and mindfully create new patterns and new ways of being. With new insights, feelings, language and actions, come new successes.

Explore your Success DNA now with me.
Start your journey by diving into the events, decisions, language and feelings that live in your system with Flight of the Changemaker printable Success DNA worksheet.

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If you want to dive deeper, come join me at Disney World, November 2-5 for an immersive and experiential Success DNA workshop. I promise you, it’ll be life-changing.

Forget the Imposter Syndrome. You Have Pioneer DNA.

Working with leaders across diverse business sectors, I often hear this: I’m afraid people will find out I’m a fraud or imposter–and the game will be over. This little voice inside is common, and imposter syndrome is a constant, nagging fear.

Prepping for a workshop recently, I pored over my notes to see what drove those feelings, and an insight emerged. When viewed through the systemic lens, people with imposter syndrome are actually in the process of breaking limiting cycles–and stepping beyond the rules of the system can feel disconcerting. With good reason.

Order, belonging, and the balance of give and receive.

If we look at the three components inherent in all systems, we might notice a few commonalities among leaders with imposter syndrome:

With order: A leader may have had to step up at an early age and take a position that didn’t really belong to them. For example, filling in for a missing parent, stepping into shoes that felt too big.

In belonging: Leaders might feel lonely–or like an outsider entirely–until they learn to inspire supportive growth and create great teams.

Balance of give and receive has it own set of dynamics which determine the kind of leaders we will or can become, and whether we will be burdened, demanding or balanced leaders. With respect to imposter syndrome, many leaders feel like they may be overpaid and will either work tirelessly to justify it or feel guilty or even fail in order to restore what they perceive as balance.

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Turns out, people like this aren’t suffering from imposter syndrome at all.

In order for a system to grow, its members must extend the systemic boundaries, breaking limiting cycles and boundaries. These leaders may feel like imposters, or be viewed as mavericks and renegades. Truth is, there’s another more accurate descriptor for them.

They are pioneers. And they have the courage to do what others have not, to look at the world differently, and to take the steps to find the answers that are needed. Good leaders have to be more so that their teams can do more. It’s a crucial step for growth.

So, the next time you feel like an imposter, remember it’s the pioneer effect. You’re willing to be bigger–and the world gets to benefit.

Re-coding your Emotional DNA

Why is my family system so important to me?

We all belong to a family system–from before birth to after death. It’s our primary pattern-maker. We succeed or fail in collusion with, or reaction to, what has happened to those before us and the ways they think, act, feel, succeed or fail and even die. Following patterns is often our way of belonging to the system. It is deeply unconscious, yet faithfully and blindly repeated. And until we understand what lives in our family systems and the purpose it serves, we’re reacting to events in our lives through old and outdated patterns rather than creating our own lives.

How is Emotional DNA created?

Events create decisions. We support these decisions through unique language and actions with ourselves and others. What we tell and teach ourselves creates the way generations now react in similar situations. And that’s how systemic patterns are created. For example, an event might lead to you say, “I will never speak my mind again–it’s too dangerous.” This can become a pattern of withdrawal and a repeated behavior of not sharing thoughts or feelings.

In the very same way, positive patterns also emerge from events in our past and our ancestors’ lives, for example showing up as: “In our family we all become successful doctors.” We’re continually creating imprints that become blueprints for the way our systems act and react. Once we realize what lives in our systems, we also realize that we can break free of limiting cycles and make different choices.

How can I use Emotional DNA to achieve success, fulfillment and happiness?

Healthy Emotional DNA is created through first understanding and acknowledging the past exactly the way it is without wishing for it to be different. We need to know who and what belongs–all of it, its correct order or place, and the correct balance of give and receive. Once we achieve those three components of Emotional DNA then we can learn to make mindful choices going forward.

Physicians and mental health professionals have known for a while that our minds can influence our physical health, but we’re beginning to discover that our minds can also change a fate into a destiny. Once you learn to see patterns and understand what they mean to your system, you can begin to choose what you wish to repeat, grow and do differently in your life. You’ll find that even one simple word or small repetitive action can be an important part of unlocking and rewiring this system.

When you put these concepts into action, you begin to lay down different neural pathways. New insights and perspectives lead to new emotions and thoughts, which in turn lead to new language, choices and actions resulting in new outcomes. Research shows, that you may even be able to activate or deactivate the physical genes that you carry. So instead of being a helpless passenger, you can drive your future–and change your Emotional DNA for generations to come.