It may sound strange to think that Gratitude affects your life directly but I want you think about this for a minute:
There are two important things to know about systemic work and constellations:
- The decisions you make about events in your system become language and actions that run your life, and
- We are affected by multi-generational patterns that we follow quite unconsciously. They create mindsets that can empower or limit us and we inherit them just like we inherit our physical DNA.
Decisions You Are Making
Taking that into consideration, you might ask yourself what decisions you are making about events in your life right now?
When you keep telling yourself how stressed, tired or unhappy you are, this becomes your truth, You and your children repeat it.
However, when you begin to introduce gratitude into your personal and professional life, your life changes.
Through this lens you can begin to see how much and how often you are blessed, do things right, are capable and are creating a life that responds to the way you shape it. You can teach yourself what’s possible simply by being conscious of what you already do!
Gratitude focuses on what’s working, what you are creating and receiving and when that becomes your focus, your language, actions, and mindsets have no option but to change. So do the ways you describe your personal and professional self.
Instead of being stressed, sad, lonely, struggling, you begin talking about yourself as lucky, blessed and engaged.
That becomes the new truth in your systems. Yes. I hear you say but I’ve had THIS happen to me.
And my question is: What did you make that mean in your world?
You are given remarkable gifts, sometimes the wrapping isn’t too pleasant but look at it through the lens of gratitude and ask: “What’s possible here” and you will find the remarkable life you are looking for. It’s right there waiting for you to speak or action it into reality.
The Constellations Piece
Now the constellations piece – dimensionalizing what I’ve just said. In other words, being able to see, feel, touch and even taste gratitude. Here’s an exercise that will help you to begin gaining a sense of what I mean. ( We call that transforming yourself)
The Life-Changing Event
I want you to write down one of the worst things that has ever happened to you. (Not one that will freak you out just one you can look at.)
- Write it out on a piece of paper and place that paper on the floor. That is your life-changing event.
- Walk around it, stand on it or near it or notice how you may back away or move closer. That is all information.
- Write down each limiting thing you say about this event on a different piece of paper and lay them down to the right of that piece of paper with the event written on it.
- Feel how that feels in your body and notice your thoughts.
- Be aware of how these thoughts and feelings affect your life.
Now. Please notice what skillsets, coping mechanisms, talents, careers, you have developed as a result of this event.
For example, you might say it’s made me too afraid to speak out- yes – and have you become really good at seeing things that others don’t, or only speaking when you can bring wisdom? You might say I am hardly alive- yes- and did you thank yourself for surviving? Are you grateful for the gift of life?
- Write down each gift, skillset, coping mechanism you have developed onto a different piece of paper. Lay those down to the left of the piece of paper with the event on it.
- Notice your thoughts, feelings, sensations in your body.
The Full Picture
Take a step back and look at the full picture.
- Walk towards the limiting side and see how true this feels for you.
- Go back and then walk towards the gifts, skillsets possibilities etc. and notice how that feels for you.
- Notice what limiting language or actions on those pieces of paper, you are ready to put down. See if you can acknowledge them and turn the piece of paper over.
- Now notice from the papers on the left, what you are ready to embrace, start, make a reality in your world and acknowledge them.
Write down the word gratitude on a piece of paper and take that in your hands.
- Notice if anything changes for you.
- Notice if anything else wants to stop or be embraced.
You might want to take a picture of your layout to remind yourself who you are when think you are limited and who you are when you embrace gratitude.
You are quite likely two very different people and how you emerge is your choice to make.
We think we are living our own lives but all too often we are simply re-living a history until we become aware of the strengths and limitations that we have inherited as a way to belong or not belong in our families. We feel these patterns in our bodies and repeat them in our thoughts and feelings. They are also incredible unlockers of our limitations and our purpose in life and their effects and potentials are profound. Decoding them and using them wisely we are able to unlock our own profound wisdom and potential.
We all have this ability; we just have to learn to use it. Once we begin to work with our patterns we are amazed to discover just how big we are. We were born to do the profound, the uncommon and the incredible. We are literally able to change our patterns and our lives.
What is the chapter that only you can write? How big are you willing to be?
Come and Find out at the Emotional DNA Workshop